Though “author” Lauren Conrad can be a dull prude she is the consciousness that binds the cast o’ kooks on The Hills. Having Kristen Cavallari replace her as the antagonist, in a sea of antagonists…. Who will we now look to as the grounding force? Heidi? Brodi? Audrina? Spencer? (Strangely, Spencer does seem the best option – how weird is that?)
I’M A CELEBRITY, GET ME OUTTA HERE:
Speaking of Speidi, getting to watch them out of their element…is not healthy. (“This cast is devaluing my fame,” complained Spencer). Seriously, whomever convinced them to venture to the Costa Rican rainforest with nine other psuedo-celebrities (Patty Blagojevich, really?) is on one hand genius, on the other hand sadist. After quitting the show, then going back a number of times, the head-honchos decided Heidi and Spencer needed to be locked in a sort of creepy-crawly chamber of horrors to redeem themselves to the cast and crew (while Heidi and Spencer were hoping to make it all good with Jesus). Though TV execs are less than kind, “They are everything that’s wrong with America… they are insincere, lazy, entitled and they claim the devil has possessed them,” Executive Vice President of Alternative Programming Paul Telegdy tells Ryan Seacrest. Heidi ended up getting stung or bitten or licked by some unfriendly creature or bacteria and had to go to the hospital for a few days (supposedly with some stomach virus). Concerned fans had to keep up with her drama-status via nut-job Stephanie Pratt’s Twitter. (Though Heidi’s last Tweet 19 hours ago is the telling, “Starbucks. yummmm” so she must be safe at home).
Oooh, and my favorite IACGMOH quotes:
- “She vandalized my hair product…I would never do that!” -Heidi on the cruelness of the show’s other contestants.
- “I’m already the King of America, and I might as well be the King of the Costa Rican Jungle.” -Spencer (thriving in his insular world)
- “I have always found it so fascinating, living with Heidi, that every single thing she prays for, to the detail, comes true. For instance, she told me Spencer, say a prayer, really try it. So I did my first prayer, ‘God please, the one person I want to go on a double date with is Miley Cyrus, and if you are so powerful, make me hang out with Miley Cyrus’, and he did it within a month.” -another gem from Spencer Pratt
It’s a weird thing, that I’m hoping Samantha Who? was canceled due to health reasons, or because Christina needed time to… get married with children. But really, I reckon it was just ABC being idiots yet again. How is that show so big budget anyway? The cost of the cast? ‘Cause it’s not like they’re computer animating disappearing islands or having live orchestras recreate tunes for celebs to dance to. Oh sure, Samantha Who? doesn’t glean those kinds of ratings but their schedule fluctuated so much that I’m sure it lost many viewers who otherwise would have loved to watch every week. Even I, who only watch online, had to keep checking when it was on because it was so sporadic. Fug them, Applegate, they don’t deserve you. Seriously, the most spot-on comedic delightfulness since Lucille Ball. What other actress could have made that show work? Donkeys! You don’t deserve her!
How I Met Your Mother:
Somewhere along the line, this turned into what I think they were hoping it would: THE replacement for Friends. Fact is, it’s so much better than Friends (even with the lead male character just as dorky as Ben Schwimmer’s). Barney-isms are the bomb –Neil Patrick Harris topping the list of funniest guy on TV– with our fave being his “Hot” to “Crazy” scale (the theory: “a girl is allowed to be crazy, as long as she’s equally hot…”). There are a few duds but more often than not each episode seems to exceed the previous. Hopefully after the cast all have their baby’s this year, they’ll have enough energy to jump back into ridiculousness next season. Are we getting bored trying to figure out who the mom is?
Yes, I know most streamin’ TV viewers prefer to use alternative sites like Supernova Tube when can, but sometimes you only find the Megavideo link (and please, don’t tell me you watch everything on Hulu. Hulu is owned by CBS, they offer legal videos but most of the new ones have a delay before they are posted and/or have a limited timeframe for playback.) Anyway, Megavideo used to be great until they implemented a time limit for free viewing (which also seemed to screw up the playback in terms of the audio/video synch). You know, with all the great advice out there, detailed work offline/change IP address, it ends up that the simplest “hack” to get Megavideo to play for free, no 70 minute limits, no fee, is go into the URL and add +++ to the end of it. You won’t be able to forward ahead until the whole thing has buffered. Anyway, it’s a lot less fiddling and pretending you are adept at all the computer mumbo-jumbo and potentially screwing up your IP / internet access to trick Megavideo into not reading your viewing minutes. ANyway, my advice for finding the best streaming video for shows you’ve missed is SideReel – they have a great weekly TV schedule, which you can personalize and links to sites that have the video you’re interested in.
FINALE vs. PREMIER:
I know it’s hard on the TV addicts to deal with all these shows ending at once! But remember, there are good things to come (while some will simply help us pass the time while waiting…). Some shows playing over the summer include: Weeds, Rescue Me, Nurse Jackie, Samantha Who?, Burn Notice, In Plain Sight, The Closer, Saving Grace, Nurse Jackie, True Blood…and of course Entourage starting in July. I miss my Ari fix! Even the reality kine, include a range of A to D-grade filler: Kathy Griffin (still luv her!), The Fashion Show, So You Think You Can Dance, Big Brother, Real Housewives of New Jersey, NYC Prep, and dare I say another round of Paris Hilton’s My New BFF? I dare….